I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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