I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
