We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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