...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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