He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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