How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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