lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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