Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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