There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
