She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
