Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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