Tell her she can't have a vagina
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
