Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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