i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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