whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
