playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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