it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
