I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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