Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize