Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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