I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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