Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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