Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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