she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
false alarm, still single
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
