I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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