All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize