i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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