If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
