fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize