vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Randomize
