I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
