You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
