Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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