I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
