did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
