Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
The best revenge is premature balding
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
