Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Every concussion has its silver lining
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize