thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
