weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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