her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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