i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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