I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
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