we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize