I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize