garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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