Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
