Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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