you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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