I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
