all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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